I'll Make You a Deal
by lonewolfzaraki
Summary: Unrelated to my other UnoZaki stories.... Enjoy.... One-shot


I'm alive!!! I know, i never keep my resolutions. the reason being i dont care for typing. And the sure fire was to get me to type is......review!!! I would like to thank sayume214 for motivating me.... let's see..... ummm i'm gonna try to update Shinigaminapped and i don't own Bleach. UnoZaki love!!!

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"Captain Zaraki, you really should try to take better care of yourself." Captain Unohana chastised him as she bandaged his many wounds.

"You tell me that every time."

"And you keep coming back in bad condition, no improvement."

"Well, it's no pain no fun right?"

"I believe it's, "No pain no gain."

"I was close."

"What if I were to say if you don't listen to me, I won't help you next time you're lost. Since the other divisions you wind up in aren't as willing to help you, or you don't want to get help from them."

"But…it's not my fault a drunk designed the place."

"I rather like the design."

"Because you can have a garden? Or because there's lots of flowers."

"No, I really don' care for flowers, too many colors. I like a couple of lilies, some sakura trees, that's about it."

"Oh, really? I though every girl liked flowers."

"Well then I'm not every girl."

"You have a point…."

"Speaking of points, you're yearly check up is coming up…" her voice trailed off. Kenpachi tensed.

"Well, um, I don't suppose…"

"No, I'm not letting you off the hook. I'm the only one you let do it, lest your fear of needles gets out. So, its only fair I get to chose the date and time."

The giant captain mumbled.

"What's o scary about needles? You're definitely not afraid of pain."

"I don't know!" They're just scary."

"Well, I'll tell you what. If you come early or on time to your appointment, two days from now, I'll give you something."

"Like what?"

"Anything you want, a life time supply of sake, a fight, you name it. And, you're done for today."

He stood up, mumbled a "See you in two days," and walked out.

XXXXXxxxxXXXXX

Two days later, the healer captain was in one of the rooms, preparing for her one appointment of the day. The fearsome captain of the 11th. She highly doubted he would arrive on time, since he never had. In fact, he had always been at least 59 minutes late.

So, she was extremely surprised when Isane opened the door 10 minutes before the scheduled appointment time, to reveal a not-so-happy Kenpachi Zaraki.

Isane bowed and left, closing the door behind him, sealing him in.

"I'm proud of you, Captain Zaraki!"

She got a now familiar grumble as a reply.

"Shall we begin?"

Mumble.

"Ok."

She began the routine procedures.

"You know…"

"Oh? You speak! So, what were you going to say?"

"Your third seat…he looks better without glasses."

"So I'm not the only one."

"You think so too?"

"Yes, I try to get him to wear contacts, but he refuses."

"Hmmm."

"Well, Captain Zaraki, it's time for your least favorite part!"

Again he tensed, and went a little pale.

"Don't look so scared. Think of the gold at the end of the evil rainbow."

Kenpachi looked away from the arm a needle was now poised over. He looked back, to see her standing directly in front of him, about to puncture him with said needle of evil. His head whipped away from the sight. He was trying to imagine the pot of gold, oddly enough, Ikkaku's head kept coming to mind, when the sun was shining on it….

"Is it over yet?"

"Why yes it is." The other captain replied in her gentle voice.

"Really?"

"Yes, that wasn't so bad now was it?"

She put a Band-Aid on it, smiling.

"There we go." She patted his arm.

Kenpachi grabbed her braid, gently pulling until her face was close to his. Then he kissed her. Retsu was taken back and unconsciously deepened the kiss.

She thought he broke it too soon. He stood up.

"C-captain Zaraki! What was that?" she was quiet flustered.

"You said I could have anything I wanted."

"…. Oh."

He put on his captain's coat, and stole one more short kiss before heading toward the door.

"Captain Zaraki! I did not say TWO things!"

"Well I guess I owe you something."

"Indeed."

The next day, a package was given to the captain of the 4th. It was a box of chocolates shaped like flowers. Of course, there was no name, Kenpachi couldn't be seen sending someone chocolates.

Sometime later, Unohana got her kiss.

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R&R!!!! And cheer up me muses. Also i kept typing "kill" instead of "kiss" at the end. So it was, "Unohana got her kill." .....


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